“Well… see… here’s the thing,

Emmarie’s Perseverance Series Continued in combination with Word Press writing prompt…

*See Previous Posts To Understand Emmarie’s Perseverance Series Bit

Do lazy days make you feel rested or unproductive?

it’s different for me. I mentally cannot have lazy days. It’s dangerous for me. Boredom is a slippery slope of negative emotional turmoil…  I’m not willing to fall and slide down violently. Silence, stillness, ALL that… leaves room for  memories and bad thoughts to creep up and take up space and create movement. Nothingness never brings on light and brighter moments… only dark voids and numbness. The emptiness gets lonely and has to clutter fast… and the lack of organization is bad… and bad… is never good… so no good… is a chaotic mess of trauma and symptoms of Psychiatric Disorders running rampant just uh dancing and skipping and jumping, and hopping, and clapping, and laughing and screaming joyfully… and so on… and so on… and so on… and it’s too much…” pause  “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO……”  pause “shew….” AND cut.

Ember wipes her forward and stops all action  with a distressed look on her face. 3. 2. 1… Curtain drops. Chatter across the building auditorium breaks out…

Emmarie tells herself she did well at her scene of the play as Ember. She can’t believe she lost herself in it like that. She was always shy and timid. Has never come out of her shell like this. Could acting, performing be her calling? A part of her purpose?

“Hmmmmm” a voice calls out from behind her.

Emmarie turns around and sees a heavy set man jogging towards her. “Me?” she says quizzically…

“Yes. Hi. I’m an agent with Hollywood’s Next Big Star Finder!”

“Oh my gosh. Wow. Hello. I’m Emmarie.”

“Pleasure is all mine. You were great out there. So believable. It was like you weren’t acting. Are you interested in becoming a famous actress? Like the next big thing? I’m talking, Jennifer Lawrence?”

“Um. Uh. I don’t know. I never thought about it. I’d have to give it some thought.” Emmarie said hesitantly but with a hint of intrigue.

“Totally understand. Big decision. Well here’s my card. If you want to go for it. Give me a call! I’ll have auditions lined up yesterday!”

“Ok. Thank you. Thank you so much!” Emmarie says as she awkwardly places her hand out and shakes the agent’s hand.

Then things kinda blur in the background. And all she can hear is her own thinking. And all she could think was what to do. This felt like a dream.